From the Mouths of Babes

Sit back. Close your eyes. Click here and listen.

Pretty weird, eh? At what point did you decide it was bogus? When I played this the first time, Stacey was in the room, and she pricked up her ears and listened in spite of herself. It was the whole "I will put an end to war" bit that really tipped her off, though it was unusual to hear Mr. "No Regrets" say that he'd been "doin' things that I shouldn't've."

You may be wondering what the meaning of all this is. Oaklander Helena Keeffe "makes art projects that serve as catalysts for social engagement." One day, she had an idea:

"'What if something like this happened to our president. What if he were humbled in some way which caused a profound change in his outlook on life and his role as the leader of our country - turning the aggressive posturing of an all-attack-all-the-time leader into a gentler, wiser soul determined to demonstrate the power of honesty and vulnerability."

With this idea in mind I put out an open call for people to write speeches for President Bush, offering a $50 cash prize."

The audio dispatch from Earth-17 at the front of this post was the winning entry, from some bunch of elementary school kids. Other drafts can be found here. My favorite is from someone - presumably another pre-teen - named Melissa (all spelling and punctuation is hers):

I know I have been a bad president and have come to the conclusion that it is because like Dick Chaney I have eaten too many twinkies. It gives you high blood-sugar!! I am sorry that all I care about is money and using all taxes for bombs to explode things. It is true I must say and it is sad but I love the word explode. Beware children the twinkies might get you!!!!!! It's True

I'm mainly getting kicks out of the weird loopiness of Melissa's entry, but I do have to say that I'm impressed at her knowledge of history - I don't think that I knew about the Twinkie Defense when I was her age.

(via Tim Blair)